PTCooler "OffTopic"

I love fall (in the northern hemisphere) and I hope you do too!. Enjoy time with the ones you love this weekend.   My brother Jim was hired by a government agency and assigned to a small office cubicle in a large area. At the end of his first day, he realized he couldn’t see over the panels to find his way out, so he waited until he saw someone else leaving and followed him. He did the same the next day. On the third day he had to work late, long after his colleagues had left. He wandered around lost in the maze of cubicles and corridors, but then, just as panic began to set in, he came upon another employee in a cubicle.   "How do you get out of here?" Jim asked.   The fellow looked up from his desk, smiled and said, "No cheese for you."

Our weekend fun was mostly about dog sitting (guess which one is mine) and prepping for a New England winter.     For U.S. Community members, what was your Labor Day weekend about?   I hope more play and less work 🙂      

If you are in the US, have a terrific long Labor Day weekend (if you haven't already started it....) Either way have a great weekend.   "If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end... it would probably be Labor Day Weekend."   If a train station is where the train stops, and a bus station is where the bus stops, what is a work station?   Did you hear about the Labor Day joke? It doesn't work for me.   Be blessed!

Be blessed this weekend. Spend time with the ones you love.   Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? A: H2O cubed   Once I told a Chemistry joke. There was no Reaction.

Pray for those that are far off. Hug those that are close to you.   Benefits of a Good Vocabulary! I recently call an old engineering buddy of mine and asked what he was working on these days. He replied that he was working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel under constrained environment." I was impressed until, upon further inquiry, I learned that he was washing dishes with hot water under his wife's supervision.

Have a terrific weekend. Enjoy the time you get to spend with your loved ones.   Student: I don’t understand why my grade was so low. How did I do on my research paper?   Teacher: Actually, you didn’t turn in a research paper. You turned in a random assemblage of sentences. In fact, the sentences you apparently kidnapped in the dead of night and forced into this violent and arbitrary plan of yours clearly seemed to be placed on the pages against their will. Reading your paper was like watching unfamiliar, uncomfortable people interacting at a dinner party that no one wanted to attend in the first place. You didn’t submit a research paper. You submitted a hostage situation.

Have a terrific weekend and spend some time with the ones you love.     What did Neil Armstrong do after he stepped on Buzz Aldrin's toe? He Apollo-gized.   Why couldn't the astronauts book a room on the moon? It was full! 

Have a terrific weekend. Stay safe. Especially where I am with a heat warning today and tomorrow.   We’ll we’ll we’ll…. if it isn’t auto-correct.   The guy who invented auto-correct for smart phones passed away today. Restaurant in peace.

Have a great weekend!!!   Proof that a cat has 9 tails.   A professor sets out a prove that a cat has nine tails. He asks his students to image two boxes on his desk. In the first box there is no cat but in the second box there is one cat. Together they agree that: “No cat has eight tails.” Now comparing the two boxes, it only makes sense that “The box with the cat has one more tail the box without a cat”. So the professor summarizes that “Since ‘No cat has eight tails.’ and ‘The box with the cat has one more tail the box without a cat’, therefor a cat has nine tails”.

For those in the US that have an extended weekend - enjoy the extra time with the ones you love. Do something special. Make memories.   For those elsewhere - hug the ones you love and enjoy your holidays when they come.     Independence Day was approaching and the teacher took the opportunity to teach her preschool class all about patriotism. She said to them, “You know, we live in a great country. And one of the best things about it is that we are all free.” At this, a little boy marched up to her from the back of the class, put his hands on his hips and said angrily, "I'm not free. I'm four."

Have a terrific weekend - Spend time with the ones you love.   A solar-powered computer wristwatch, which is programmed to tell the time and date for 125 years, has a guarantee—for two years.

For those in the northern hemisphere - enjoy the summer solstice.    "Meet my coworker, the Boy Who Cried, ASAP."   An intern was given $50 to the boss some lunch. Told to get himself something, he bought a t-shirt.

Have a terrific day...   Happy Flag Day ( in the United States)...     Professors define a kiss: Math: Two divided by nothing Physics: The contraction of the mouth due to the expansion of the heart Accounting: It's a credit because it is profitable when returned Economics: A thing for which the demand is higher than the supply Dentistry: It's infectious and antiseptic

Have a terrific weekend. For those traveling to LiveWorx - safe travels.   Q: How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children? A: `I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times…’   Q: Why should the number 288 never be mentioned? A: It’s two gross.  

Have a terrific weekend and enjoy time with the ones you love.     A farmer counted 196 cows in the field, but when he rounded them up, he had 200.     I put my root beer in a square glass. Now it’s just beer.   (remember last week - don't drink and derive)

Those those in the US, have a terrific long weekend. Everyone should spend sometime remembering those who died in service for their country. You could also go to many of the parks this weekend. Speaking of parks....   Why do mathematicians like parks? Because of all the natural logs.   ... also stay safe.... Why should you not mix alcohol and calculus? Because you should never drink and derive.

Have a great weekend. Get outside and enjoy the creation around you.   A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, “No, I’m traveling light.”   A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replies, “For you, no charge.”

Have a terrific weekend. Spend time with the ones you love.   Never trust math teachers who use graph paper...... they are always plotting something.

LOL

Have a terrific weekend and if you are in Holland MI during the next week and a half, enjoy Tulip Time Festival: https://www.tuliptime.com/       He thinks he's really smooth, but he's only C^1.

When "Online" Community Managers are able to meet "onsite" to plan--great things can happen!   We have a lot of great things in store for our members. Can't wait to share the details!  Stay Tuned!   Please tell me what you think of our Community Sign as a reply below!     Community Training January 2019 Community Planning April 2019  

Have a terrific weekend. Spend time with the ones you love.   A group of NASA mechanical engineers were brainstorming how they might overcome the various thermal problems involved in sending a manned probe to the sun.   An electrical engineer overheard the discussion and offered the following suggestion: Why don’t you just go at night?

Have a blessed time this Easter weekend and spend some time with the Son on Sunday.  

Have a terrific weekend. Enjoy some time out doors. Hugs the ones you love.   Powers of Concentration If there is one trait that best defines an engineer it is the ability to concentrate on one subject to the complete exclusion of everything else. This sometimes causes engineers to be pronounced dead prematurely. Some funeral homes in high-tech areas have started checking resumes before processing bodies. Anybody with a degree in electrical engineering or experience in computer programming is propped up in the lounge for a few days just to see if he or she snaps out of it.

Be blessed this weekend...... enjoy time with the ones you love.   Frugality Engineers are notoriously frugal. This is not because of cheapness or mean spirit; it is simply because every spending situation is simply a problem in optimization, that is, "How can I escape this situation while retaining the greatest amount of cash?"